Dave Barry
You should never say anything to a woman that even remotely suggests that you think she's pregnant unless you can see an actual baby emerging from her at that moment.
Nora Ephron
If pregnancy were a book they would cut the last two chapters.
Lawrence Housman
If nature had arranged that husbands and wives should have children alternately, there would never be more than three in a family.
Phyllis Diller
By far the most common craving of pregnant women is not to be pregnant.
Cathy Crimmins
A period is just the beginning of a lifelong sentence.
Rita Rudner
Life is tough enough without having someone kick you from the inside.
Irena Chalmers
There are three reasons for breast-feeding: the milk is always at the right temperature; it comes in attractive containers; and the cat can't get it.
Sam Levenson
Somewhere on this globe, every ten seconds, there is a woman giving birth to a child. She must be found and stopped.
Sherry Glaser
I realize why women die in childbirth - it's preferable.
Joyce Armor
Think of stretch marks as pregnancy service stripes.
You should never say anything to a woman that even remotely suggests that you think she's pregnant unless you can see an actual baby emerging from her at that moment.
Nora Ephron
If pregnancy were a book they would cut the last two chapters.
Lawrence Housman
If nature had arranged that husbands and wives should have children alternately, there would never be more than three in a family.
Phyllis Diller
By far the most common craving of pregnant women is not to be pregnant.
Cathy Crimmins
A period is just the beginning of a lifelong sentence.
Rita Rudner
Life is tough enough without having someone kick you from the inside.
Irena Chalmers
There are three reasons for breast-feeding: the milk is always at the right temperature; it comes in attractive containers; and the cat can't get it.
Sam Levenson
Somewhere on this globe, every ten seconds, there is a woman giving birth to a child. She must be found and stopped.
Sherry Glaser
I realize why women die in childbirth - it's preferable.
Joyce Armor
Think of stretch marks as pregnancy service stripes.
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